Parent questions school's handling of sports incident

To the editor:

As a concerned parent, I would appreciate your consideration in printing this letter. Each year, before the students can participate in any sports program, the athletes and parents must attend a meeting.

The purpose of this meeting is for the school's athletic director and coaches to go over with the parents and athletes respecting not only our team but the other teams as well and good sportsmanship in general. We are also supposed to watch a video on good sportsmanship and parents not interfering with the game.

On May 15, while playing an away game, my daughter and another player misplayed a ball in the field. When the inning was over, my daughter ran to the dugout and was met by one of the coaches. The coach proceeded to push by daughter's left shoulder hard enough to where she stumbled and bumped into a teammate. When this happened, I saw another of our coaches drop his head and walk away.

The next inning, my daughter almost made an outstanding play. One of the coaches hollered, 'Now that's what I mean." I responded in anger, "It took a shove to wake my daughter up?!"

At the time, I was seated in the same area as some of the parents of the other team. I feel I owe those parents an apology for my outburst. I just couldn't bite my tongue after witnessing the coach shove my daughter.

After the game, I approached the coach and said, "I have never shoved my daughter the way you did during the game." He replied that he just touched her, and I replied, "You shoved her." He then said that he had apologized to her. I turned and walked away, still disgusted with his actions.

Upon arriving at our school to pick up my daughter after the game, I observed the coach talking to my daughter like nothing had happened. I was so upset by this that I parked far enough away from them that she would have to walk to our vehicle so I wouldn't say anything I'd regret later.

When she got in our vehicle, I asked her if the coach had apologized. I explained to her that I had talked to the coach about the incident. She replied that nobody had apologized to her. My daughter and I decided it was in the best interest of the girls not to bring the incident to the school's attention until after the season was complete.

The following day, I was informed that my daughter had been called into the office because the incident had been brought to the school's attention. On May 17, I called the school about the incident. The school informed me they had warned the coach.

I responded, "Is that all you're going to do? I have to live with what I saw the rest of my life."

I informed the school of our decision not to pursue the matter until the season was over. That evening at our game, a school official approached me and informed me the coach was not at the game. The school felt it was better for the coach not to be there. I was shocked they had taken it upon themselves to do this.

The official said that they would let me know by May 21 of their decision on the incident. I found out my daughter was being blamed for the coach not being at the game, so I called the school that Friday to ask them to inform the other coaches that I was the one that informed the school about the incident. I only did this because I didn't like my daughter being blamed for something she hadn't done.

My questions are: Was I wrong in wanting to wait until the season was over to address the incident and not bring distraction to the team? Which is more important, protecting a coach and having successful seasons or protecting our student-athletes?

Sincerely,
Rick Davy
Hillsboro